After one of my recent posts, one of my friends (who is also a Facebook friend) commented that, "you have got it all figured out, Melissa". I believe she intended to complement me. But, the comment stuck with me; and, I can honestly say, without a doubt, that I absolutely NEVER feel like "I have it all figured out".
As I stumble and fumble and bumble through my days as a homeschooling mama of three, including a 7-week-old, there are some days when I feel less inadequate and some days when I feel completely inadequate. Despite what I learned as a teen/20-something--you know, "never let them see you sweat"--that attitude really never served me well. I was always trying to prove myself.
I still wear a pretty good "poker face"; but, again, that doesn't really get me anywhere I want to be.
I was/am SO WRONG. What my journey in the past few years and my increasing faith and trust in God has taught me more than anything is that I can not do ANYTHING alone. I need Him for EVERYTHING. So, as I make mistakes (and pray for forgiveness) and keep trying to live this life, I try to keep my eyes wide open and try so hard to give EVERYTHING to Him--ALL my worries, ALL my tasks, ALL my thanks, ALL my praise. Still, I stumble. Humbly, I stumble.
